To some of you the following may sound like a truck load of crazy, but until this month the last time Dan and I took a weekend was summer 2014. When I think back to those days and try and remember what we did, the things that come to mind are lots of trips to the pub, wine and cheese afternoons (this is not as fancy as it sounds – just us with a bottle of wine and our body weight in cheese, sitting on the sofa) and strolls around town. Nothing remarkable but restful.
I don’t need to tell anyone who’s renovated a house that these kinds of weekends went out the window circa October 2014. Initially it was the most exciting way I could imagine spending a weekend. Up by 8am, over to the house/DIY store, and obviously it was only going to take six months, so a small sacrifice for such a huge gain. Hahahaha. Little did we know.
A year and a half later the reality set in it will probably never be finished finished, and there will always be maintenance. Maybe it was time to give up our quest for a feeling of closure.
Life with a baby inevitable cuts down your time to do things and as well as the house we are both trying to achieve a lot personally with our limited time, but when I’m honest with myself we had not even begun to embrace the principals of minimalism when it comes to our time. In a way this is probably the most important way any of us can embrace simplicity nowadays. There is so much grabbing for our time and attention, so many requests, so much content, the ever present FOMO, but in all honestly how much of this do we want to be doing?
Yesterday I was reading about FOGO (fear of going out) and I thought YES! Not literally agoraphobia, (that sounds dreadful) but the reclamation of wine and cheese afternoons. Not feeling we are missing out by doing what we truly want. Or in my case not feeling guilty and scrabbling for the nearest to do list every time I look at the unpainted skirting board in our sitting room.
The last two weekends we had actual weekends. Ok we still woke up at 6am, no more of those pre-baby lie ins, but we went for lunch, met up with my parents at a garden centre, made plans on the day, not in advance. And it felt brilliant.
My hope is that a little genuine weekending will help us regain some energy, depleted this last year by DIY and new parenthood. Maybe one day we will live in a perfect house (one that no doubt we have paid someone else to decorate) but for now I’ll take my weekends over a perfectly painted skirting board.
I hope that this weekend habit is just the start of me reclaiming my time, for embracing a less is more approach to the hours, and learning to say no thank you a bit more. Any laid back experts out there with tips on fighting the urge to always be busy let me know your secrets. I’ll be eternally grateful.